One of my issues with the term autogynephilia is that it translates to "love of oneself as a woman." However, many of these men clearly hate themselves and/or clearly hate women. There is a new cohort of "transmaxxers" who don't seem to care one way or the other about women, but see being a woman as advantageous in today's society. So they seek to take advantage of job offerings, scholarships, or other special privileges. They don't seem to fit the "classic definition" of autogynephilia so how does lumping them in with other AGPs help us to understand them or deal with them in society? And to ignore the impact of porn and online grooming is to basically say no one has every believed they truly needed something after seeing 100 commercials about that thing. If that were true advertising would not be the industry it is today. ALL of us are influenced by what we watch. ALL of us can be sold a lie. Ignoring that reality seems to me to be a big blindspot in the research. But maybe you will address porn and grooming in a future essay.
No one has the right to deceive the public about what sex they are in situations where it matters, such as, what bathroom or changing room you just entered, what sports you're allowed to play in, what awards you are entitled to, who shows up when a woman is requested to bathe someone's elderly mother or a woman is requested to chaperone little girls or a woman is requested on a dating app, etc. No man-in-a-dress has the right to use descriptors that are exclusive to females. I do not consent to men pretending to be women so that they may enter my female-only spaces. I do not consent to the demand that I acknowledge their kink or mental illness as something to be embraced, ignored or put up with. No means no. Work on your mental illness and keep your kink in your adults only clubs.
I would challenge you to identify why “auto gyno philosophy” is not “auto pornos philia” as in “enjoyment of considering one’s-self as a prostitute”.
The vast majority of visible AGP, in contrast to genital-dysphoric men and ordinary delusional men (“female brain”) “present” themselves as what is called in fashion “hookerwear” - do watch some episodes of “Project Runway” for the language of the trade.
I’m a gay man, and I’ve been around and known these men off and on for over 50 years on three continents. I lived in a wide variety of communities - straight hippie commune in Paris, in the Red Light District in Amsterdam, Castro SF, Kota Kinabalu Malaysia, Pasadena, Beverly Hills, Long Beach and Ventura in LA, Montrose Houston, and worked in dozens of cities 5 continents, and circulated in 7-8 gay “affinity” groups - drag, leather, fetish, bear, daddy, twink, muscle, chems. In all of these groups, which generally accommodate these men for amusement factor, the main thing in common in every single context is that they are all irresistibly drawn to hookerdom.
Genital dysphoric and delusional trans I’ve known end up “presenting” at best like Dustin Hoffman in “Tootsie”.
Claiming these men wish to appear as women is an insult to women - and I can’t object strenuously enough - almost all women _don’t look like hookers_. Claiming they derive sexual satisfaction by considering themselves being women is false. They don’t derive pleasure by appearing like a Gap Ad, they want to appear as extreme “Adult Video” AVN award winners. Therefore you have Phil Illy, a muted but still distinctly hooker.
Once you properly reframe the behavior it’s quite transparent. Most men are utterly unaware of clothing and styling systems actual women adopt, which is why it doesn’t seem apparent at all. I find it mystifying.
Likewise I challenge the concept that a male child derives sexual pleasure from considering themselves as an adult woman. Adult sexual concepts are terra incognita for children until fairly well along in puberty. Few children I’m aware of in all literature I’ve read derive pleasures from the most mundane fetish categories adults enjoy. Displace AGP on any other fetish and you have little or no evidence.
Children who have been mutilated chemically and never emerged from puberty have only the most naive and childlike view of sexuality. The utterances of Jazz Jennings are an object lesson in unawareness.
Further elaborating on your comment, they fantasize themselves as a woman during sex, or in the sexual relationship. They don't feel like mothers, taking care of children, doing house chores. They may feel like female during sex due to high sex drive combined with erectile dysfunction. Amphetamines, cocaine, porn, manic episodes etc. can cause this.
Of course, someone who has a sexual fetish or obsession is not inherently evil. Of course, someone with such a fetish or obsession is worthy of respect and all the same basic human rights everyone else deserves.
However, there is no subtlety in the fact that these men (and teenage boys) do not have the right to force others to pretend they are "real" women/girls. That is a lie. It is that simple.
Do I care if a man wears a dress? No. Do I care if he enters a women's dressing room, prison, or rape crisis center, or competes in women's sports? Yes. Do I care if our insurance and tax dollars and medical resources are used to mutilate their bodies to appear female? Yes.
I am very interested in how we can assist these men in controlling their sexual urges while also having enjoyable lives. This would include exploration of the causes of such fetishism as well as how to become comfortable in their own skin and not invade women's spaces (or, as Ute says, not to force women to become a part of, or play into, their fetish - unless of course, any such women are truly into it, in which case they are free to go at it).
I am not at all interested in pretending men are women or boys are girls. Ever. There is too much at stake to support that lie. This impacts both women's/girls' rights, and the health and well-being of children and teens and vulnerable young adults, male or female, who suffer with confusion about their sex, body dysmorphia, etc. When they buy into the lie that a person can actually switch sexes, they buy into the medical interventions that harm their bodies as well as the body hatred that they are encouraged to have. This has got to end.
Extremely well put, I agree. I’m sure I read somewhere that the more someone indulges in a fetish the more powerful it becomes. I don’t think all men and teens with agp are predators and we need to understand them in order to help them.
Do we "lack nuance" because we know that "Maya" Kaye detransitioned and is now back to his given name, Sam, at Call Me Sam YouTube channel? While detransitioning after 25 years of applying "Maya" and make-up to convince himself he's got a female soul, he interviewed both Katie Went and Debbie (David) Hayton on his channel, then called "Maya Kaye." Both of these male-bodied self-admitted AGP personalities tried, with conviction based on their own "transitions" to "keep Maya" and avoid the path to Sam, with a purposeful "de-stigmatization of AGP." That seemed to lack nuance--in fact, quite self-serving on their parts. Nevertheless, Sam returned to his male biology, had a complicated surgery to remove the breast implants, and as he says every video at Call Me Sam channel, he regrets losing his male genitals, he regrets living "as a woman" for all those years and he knows he's unable to have his old face back, as his program of "transition" included facial feminization surgery. I've always found those dangerous surgeries right next to the facial nerves used in talking and eating to truly lack nuance. Especially since the new chin line for almost all of them is identical. I'd look for nuance in the regret patterns of those who left off the ideation. I'd also ask the entire profession of psychology/psychiatry to stop telling these men's wives that we "need to help his embodiment goals" by sex role play in bed. Without needing a scintilla of nuance, I can tell you, coercing a wife into pretend male "Marquis de Sade" role play is ritual manipulation and coercive control, and the entire profession owes trans widows an apology. BTW, Dr. "Connie" Christine Wheeler, famous Manhattan "gender wizard" PhD psychologist, (diagnosed my ex in the first appt, per her very nuanced sworn affidavit) has now lost her certification, due to insurance fraud. Funny, how these professionals invent lucrative quirks! A fetish is a fetish. Here's my video about the former prostitutes who contacted me to say these dudes "pay more, want humiliation and bring their own cocaine. It doesn't seem to be about the sex."
I don't know if this comment fits into your category of "respectful and useful", but the only science about AGP I'm interested in is that which leads to a) a cure for those who have it, and b) prevention to make sure no more cases occur. I don't want any parent to have an autogynaephilic son.
Yeah, that's one point of view. Another prominent expert, Dr Az Hakeem doesn't (as far as I understand)see AGP as a large circle with cross-dressers as part of it, but as a distinct and very small group. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHe5vbMj_YU) Since there is no lab test to prove or disprove either point of view, each of us will align with the point of view that is closer to ours. To me Dr Hakeem's view makes more sense but I understand that I am as biased as anybody. Please let me know if you and Dr Hakeem ever have a debate, I would love to listen!
You are entirely wrong about the stance of radical feminism on trans issues. Which is fine, lots of people are. You are mixing it up with loud liberal feminism. Again, a common error.
The problem here is that you write this piece in a tone of expert condescension: you know ALL ABOUT all positions in the arena and are going to clarify it for the rubes in the cheap seats. And then you step in it immediately, showing a complete lack of knowledge about a basic position.
"Sorry for the long post…however, as the parent of a son, I hope we can keep an open mind about the young males caught up in this ideology/cult. Bailey has his theory and yes, he is a researcher, however research into sex and paraphilia is based on surveys and anecdotal evidence from those who choose to participate. Those of us with ROGD males have implored Bailey to talk with us, talk with Detrans males, dig into the porn/sissy porn, the online groups on Reddit/Tumblr/Discord and he has rebuffed our requests to understand the new forces (smart phone, etc..) that have emerged since his initial research some 30 years ago. We know there is a sexual component, they are males and the Detrans males have told us - however it may be avoidance of sex due to societal forces telling them they are toxic, it may be ASD where puberty and societal expectations are particularly confusing. Just please be aware that labelling all males as AGP is going to harm those who are not and will make it more impossible to understand what is going on and how to help them. Even those who do show AGP tendencies, should not think that cannot be managed. One young man told me that when he shut down the porn, he no longer had the need to cross dress. Sadly, this was after estrogen, breast implants and an orchiectomy 100% paid for by Medicaid."
That is so tragic, "One young man told me that when he shut down the porn, he no longer had the need to cross dress. Sadly, this was after estrogen, breast implants and an orchiectomy 100% paid for by Medicaid." It is the very thing I pray does not happen to my son.
I'm a commonsensically gender critical cis het older female. (My views are here: https://anniegottlieb.substack.com/p/this-has-to-be-stopped). I had a direct encounter with autogynephilia, which made me realize it's a real phenomenon. The person who brought the reality home to me is a sweet person and in my opinion entirely harmless, though perhaps emotionally inappropriate around boundaries. I still regard him/her as a friend.
This person, born in an Asian country, worked as an activities leader at my mother's assisted living facility. His/her gender was completely ambiguous and s/he wanted to be addressed as "she," but because of a more boyish impression was constantly misgendered by the elderly and in some cases demented patients, and accepted it cheerfully, with a joke. I have no idea what, if any, medical transition steps s/he had taken. S/he was cuddly and affectionate and perhaps got too emotionally involved with some of the residents (s/he did a fair amount of crying on my mom's shoulder), and eventually lost the job, I suspect because of that though I don't know the specific circumstances. (The facility was very tolerant and matter-of-factly had a few other gay and trans staff members.)
The person in question is a photographer and artist, and had a show of their work at the facility. I was astonished by the incredibly sensual portrayals of women—one after another. I thought, "If this person loves women so much, why did he want to BE one? He aspired to be a lesbian??" When I encountered the concept of AGP, it was an "aha" moment.
My mother has since died (age 100!) but I am still Facebook friends with this former caregiver (who lifted my mom's spirits quite a lot) and would gladly meet with them if I get a chance when visiting their city. I consider this individual not merely harmless, but on balance a very positive, compassionate and creative contributor to the world.
I often read and hear "love is love" invoked by people who apparently don't know the difference between love and sex. By their definition, men like Samuel Little, Ted Bundy or Randy Kraft are poor dopes smitten by an excess of love, expressed by rape and murder.
SEXUAL ATTRACTION IS NOT LOVE. "You can't help who you love." No. It's: You can't help who you are sexually attracted to. I wish people would stop trying to conflate the two. Sure, love can be coincidental with sex, but it's mostly not. Most love is in tandem with parent and child or between siblings, friends, co-workers, classmates, teacher. Love between sexual partners probably doesn't apply in most cases, except momentarily with a little surge of oxytocin. Stop trying to ennoble the urge to merge by mislabeling it as looove.
I know three people with AGP. All of them are straight men. None have transitioned. All are married to women who know about their sexuality. One of the wives is actually into it. One is tolerant though not into it. The other hates it, but as long as he doesn't talk about it - which he doesn't - they do ok. They are all fine people. I also know of AGP people in the black circle - they are quite horrible but I am sure quite a minority. What I do know that it is an incredibly strong drive from talking to and seeing the lives of these friends, I don't think therapy is going to "fix it" any more than fixing gays works. None of these men hate women; but they do have self-loathing for sure. For the one I am closest to, the self-loathing relates to not being able to be normal sexually so feeling that he is unloveable and undesirable to his wife. It's sad - but after 50 years of trying to be "normal" - only older age helped when he stopped feeling much sexual desire.
I am not sure why you attack radical feminism; generally radical feminists are not vociferous supporters of trans activism. I can also say that many women are rightly offended by men using their reality as a fetishist, radical feminists or not. I have a visceral reaction to men who do this, as a women who has suffered from misogyny, and although we don't want to base movements on feelings, there are valid reasons women don't want to be around AGPs and we owe them noting. It is like one more insult men can help upon women.
Well, looks like your series is going to be hotly contested. Personally I don't have a dog in this fight. Really only became aware of AGP at most 2 years ago, initially through becoming aware of trans issues by seeing news related to adolescents. After retiring last year seemed to have spent more time reading about this, thinking about it from the perspective of my graduate level training in neurobiology and behavior. So looking forward to reading your future contributions to this series, where I'm hoping you will be able to provide more detail on data driven studies that have been done to date and discussion of what future studies might look like. Not sure how much progress you're going to be able to make in terms of changing anyone's thinking. Are you planning at all to take this project into more trans activists venues also? Seems that if you want the scientific approach you are promoting to have any hope of having an impact on policy making that offers compromises that are reasonable for everyone you need to work both sides.
The technical lexicon used here is part of the fake scholarship and fake science of critical gender theory and should be canceled. "autogynephilia"... you mean cross-dressing fetish? Just use that term.
One of my issues with the term autogynephilia is that it translates to "love of oneself as a woman." However, many of these men clearly hate themselves and/or clearly hate women. There is a new cohort of "transmaxxers" who don't seem to care one way or the other about women, but see being a woman as advantageous in today's society. So they seek to take advantage of job offerings, scholarships, or other special privileges. They don't seem to fit the "classic definition" of autogynephilia so how does lumping them in with other AGPs help us to understand them or deal with them in society? And to ignore the impact of porn and online grooming is to basically say no one has every believed they truly needed something after seeing 100 commercials about that thing. If that were true advertising would not be the industry it is today. ALL of us are influenced by what we watch. ALL of us can be sold a lie. Ignoring that reality seems to me to be a big blindspot in the research. But maybe you will address porn and grooming in a future essay.
No one has the right to deceive the public about what sex they are in situations where it matters, such as, what bathroom or changing room you just entered, what sports you're allowed to play in, what awards you are entitled to, who shows up when a woman is requested to bathe someone's elderly mother or a woman is requested to chaperone little girls or a woman is requested on a dating app, etc. No man-in-a-dress has the right to use descriptors that are exclusive to females. I do not consent to men pretending to be women so that they may enter my female-only spaces. I do not consent to the demand that I acknowledge their kink or mental illness as something to be embraced, ignored or put up with. No means no. Work on your mental illness and keep your kink in your adults only clubs.
I would challenge you to identify why “auto gyno philosophy” is not “auto pornos philia” as in “enjoyment of considering one’s-self as a prostitute”.
The vast majority of visible AGP, in contrast to genital-dysphoric men and ordinary delusional men (“female brain”) “present” themselves as what is called in fashion “hookerwear” - do watch some episodes of “Project Runway” for the language of the trade.
I’m a gay man, and I’ve been around and known these men off and on for over 50 years on three continents. I lived in a wide variety of communities - straight hippie commune in Paris, in the Red Light District in Amsterdam, Castro SF, Kota Kinabalu Malaysia, Pasadena, Beverly Hills, Long Beach and Ventura in LA, Montrose Houston, and worked in dozens of cities 5 continents, and circulated in 7-8 gay “affinity” groups - drag, leather, fetish, bear, daddy, twink, muscle, chems. In all of these groups, which generally accommodate these men for amusement factor, the main thing in common in every single context is that they are all irresistibly drawn to hookerdom.
Genital dysphoric and delusional trans I’ve known end up “presenting” at best like Dustin Hoffman in “Tootsie”.
Claiming these men wish to appear as women is an insult to women - and I can’t object strenuously enough - almost all women _don’t look like hookers_. Claiming they derive sexual satisfaction by considering themselves being women is false. They don’t derive pleasure by appearing like a Gap Ad, they want to appear as extreme “Adult Video” AVN award winners. Therefore you have Phil Illy, a muted but still distinctly hooker.
Once you properly reframe the behavior it’s quite transparent. Most men are utterly unaware of clothing and styling systems actual women adopt, which is why it doesn’t seem apparent at all. I find it mystifying.
Likewise I challenge the concept that a male child derives sexual pleasure from considering themselves as an adult woman. Adult sexual concepts are terra incognita for children until fairly well along in puberty. Few children I’m aware of in all literature I’ve read derive pleasures from the most mundane fetish categories adults enjoy. Displace AGP on any other fetish and you have little or no evidence.
Children who have been mutilated chemically and never emerged from puberty have only the most naive and childlike view of sexuality. The utterances of Jazz Jennings are an object lesson in unawareness.
Further elaborating on your comment, they fantasize themselves as a woman during sex, or in the sexual relationship. They don't feel like mothers, taking care of children, doing house chores. They may feel like female during sex due to high sex drive combined with erectile dysfunction. Amphetamines, cocaine, porn, manic episodes etc. can cause this.
Bravo!!
Of course, someone who has a sexual fetish or obsession is not inherently evil. Of course, someone with such a fetish or obsession is worthy of respect and all the same basic human rights everyone else deserves.
However, there is no subtlety in the fact that these men (and teenage boys) do not have the right to force others to pretend they are "real" women/girls. That is a lie. It is that simple.
Do I care if a man wears a dress? No. Do I care if he enters a women's dressing room, prison, or rape crisis center, or competes in women's sports? Yes. Do I care if our insurance and tax dollars and medical resources are used to mutilate their bodies to appear female? Yes.
I am very interested in how we can assist these men in controlling their sexual urges while also having enjoyable lives. This would include exploration of the causes of such fetishism as well as how to become comfortable in their own skin and not invade women's spaces (or, as Ute says, not to force women to become a part of, or play into, their fetish - unless of course, any such women are truly into it, in which case they are free to go at it).
I am not at all interested in pretending men are women or boys are girls. Ever. There is too much at stake to support that lie. This impacts both women's/girls' rights, and the health and well-being of children and teens and vulnerable young adults, male or female, who suffer with confusion about their sex, body dysmorphia, etc. When they buy into the lie that a person can actually switch sexes, they buy into the medical interventions that harm their bodies as well as the body hatred that they are encouraged to have. This has got to end.
Extremely well put, I agree. I’m sure I read somewhere that the more someone indulges in a fetish the more powerful it becomes. I don’t think all men and teens with agp are predators and we need to understand them in order to help them.
Yes girl!
Do we "lack nuance" because we know that "Maya" Kaye detransitioned and is now back to his given name, Sam, at Call Me Sam YouTube channel? While detransitioning after 25 years of applying "Maya" and make-up to convince himself he's got a female soul, he interviewed both Katie Went and Debbie (David) Hayton on his channel, then called "Maya Kaye." Both of these male-bodied self-admitted AGP personalities tried, with conviction based on their own "transitions" to "keep Maya" and avoid the path to Sam, with a purposeful "de-stigmatization of AGP." That seemed to lack nuance--in fact, quite self-serving on their parts. Nevertheless, Sam returned to his male biology, had a complicated surgery to remove the breast implants, and as he says every video at Call Me Sam channel, he regrets losing his male genitals, he regrets living "as a woman" for all those years and he knows he's unable to have his old face back, as his program of "transition" included facial feminization surgery. I've always found those dangerous surgeries right next to the facial nerves used in talking and eating to truly lack nuance. Especially since the new chin line for almost all of them is identical. I'd look for nuance in the regret patterns of those who left off the ideation. I'd also ask the entire profession of psychology/psychiatry to stop telling these men's wives that we "need to help his embodiment goals" by sex role play in bed. Without needing a scintilla of nuance, I can tell you, coercing a wife into pretend male "Marquis de Sade" role play is ritual manipulation and coercive control, and the entire profession owes trans widows an apology. BTW, Dr. "Connie" Christine Wheeler, famous Manhattan "gender wizard" PhD psychologist, (diagnosed my ex in the first appt, per her very nuanced sworn affidavit) has now lost her certification, due to insurance fraud. Funny, how these professionals invent lucrative quirks! A fetish is a fetish. Here's my video about the former prostitutes who contacted me to say these dudes "pay more, want humiliation and bring their own cocaine. It doesn't seem to be about the sex."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTUmEUXM5wc&t=9s
I don't know if this comment fits into your category of "respectful and useful", but the only science about AGP I'm interested in is that which leads to a) a cure for those who have it, and b) prevention to make sure no more cases occur. I don't want any parent to have an autogynaephilic son.
Yeah, that's one point of view. Another prominent expert, Dr Az Hakeem doesn't (as far as I understand)see AGP as a large circle with cross-dressers as part of it, but as a distinct and very small group. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHe5vbMj_YU) Since there is no lab test to prove or disprove either point of view, each of us will align with the point of view that is closer to ours. To me Dr Hakeem's view makes more sense but I understand that I am as biased as anybody. Please let me know if you and Dr Hakeem ever have a debate, I would love to listen!
You are entirely wrong about the stance of radical feminism on trans issues. Which is fine, lots of people are. You are mixing it up with loud liberal feminism. Again, a common error.
The problem here is that you write this piece in a tone of expert condescension: you know ALL ABOUT all positions in the arena and are going to clarify it for the rubes in the cheap seats. And then you step in it immediately, showing a complete lack of knowledge about a basic position.
Cripes.
Posting a friend's message:
"Sorry for the long post…however, as the parent of a son, I hope we can keep an open mind about the young males caught up in this ideology/cult. Bailey has his theory and yes, he is a researcher, however research into sex and paraphilia is based on surveys and anecdotal evidence from those who choose to participate. Those of us with ROGD males have implored Bailey to talk with us, talk with Detrans males, dig into the porn/sissy porn, the online groups on Reddit/Tumblr/Discord and he has rebuffed our requests to understand the new forces (smart phone, etc..) that have emerged since his initial research some 30 years ago. We know there is a sexual component, they are males and the Detrans males have told us - however it may be avoidance of sex due to societal forces telling them they are toxic, it may be ASD where puberty and societal expectations are particularly confusing. Just please be aware that labelling all males as AGP is going to harm those who are not and will make it more impossible to understand what is going on and how to help them. Even those who do show AGP tendencies, should not think that cannot be managed. One young man told me that when he shut down the porn, he no longer had the need to cross dress. Sadly, this was after estrogen, breast implants and an orchiectomy 100% paid for by Medicaid."
That is so tragic, "One young man told me that when he shut down the porn, he no longer had the need to cross dress. Sadly, this was after estrogen, breast implants and an orchiectomy 100% paid for by Medicaid." It is the very thing I pray does not happen to my son.
The nofap subreddit has 1 million users. Many porn users know that porn deforms sexuality.
There is nothing wrong with a person having autogynaphilic fantasies in their repertoire of sexual fantasies.
It is problematic only when someone tries to make those fantasies come true and begins to infringe on women's spaces and rights.
Such a person is by definition... a nutball.
They may or may not come back to reality with counseling and time, but they must not be allowed into women's spaces.
They are men.
I'm a commonsensically gender critical cis het older female. (My views are here: https://anniegottlieb.substack.com/p/this-has-to-be-stopped). I had a direct encounter with autogynephilia, which made me realize it's a real phenomenon. The person who brought the reality home to me is a sweet person and in my opinion entirely harmless, though perhaps emotionally inappropriate around boundaries. I still regard him/her as a friend.
This person, born in an Asian country, worked as an activities leader at my mother's assisted living facility. His/her gender was completely ambiguous and s/he wanted to be addressed as "she," but because of a more boyish impression was constantly misgendered by the elderly and in some cases demented patients, and accepted it cheerfully, with a joke. I have no idea what, if any, medical transition steps s/he had taken. S/he was cuddly and affectionate and perhaps got too emotionally involved with some of the residents (s/he did a fair amount of crying on my mom's shoulder), and eventually lost the job, I suspect because of that though I don't know the specific circumstances. (The facility was very tolerant and matter-of-factly had a few other gay and trans staff members.)
The person in question is a photographer and artist, and had a show of their work at the facility. I was astonished by the incredibly sensual portrayals of women—one after another. I thought, "If this person loves women so much, why did he want to BE one? He aspired to be a lesbian??" When I encountered the concept of AGP, it was an "aha" moment.
My mother has since died (age 100!) but I am still Facebook friends with this former caregiver (who lifted my mom's spirits quite a lot) and would gladly meet with them if I get a chance when visiting their city. I consider this individual not merely harmless, but on balance a very positive, compassionate and creative contributor to the world.
I often read and hear "love is love" invoked by people who apparently don't know the difference between love and sex. By their definition, men like Samuel Little, Ted Bundy or Randy Kraft are poor dopes smitten by an excess of love, expressed by rape and murder.
SEXUAL ATTRACTION IS NOT LOVE. "You can't help who you love." No. It's: You can't help who you are sexually attracted to. I wish people would stop trying to conflate the two. Sure, love can be coincidental with sex, but it's mostly not. Most love is in tandem with parent and child or between siblings, friends, co-workers, classmates, teacher. Love between sexual partners probably doesn't apply in most cases, except momentarily with a little surge of oxytocin. Stop trying to ennoble the urge to merge by mislabeling it as looove.
I know three people with AGP. All of them are straight men. None have transitioned. All are married to women who know about their sexuality. One of the wives is actually into it. One is tolerant though not into it. The other hates it, but as long as he doesn't talk about it - which he doesn't - they do ok. They are all fine people. I also know of AGP people in the black circle - they are quite horrible but I am sure quite a minority. What I do know that it is an incredibly strong drive from talking to and seeing the lives of these friends, I don't think therapy is going to "fix it" any more than fixing gays works. None of these men hate women; but they do have self-loathing for sure. For the one I am closest to, the self-loathing relates to not being able to be normal sexually so feeling that he is unloveable and undesirable to his wife. It's sad - but after 50 years of trying to be "normal" - only older age helped when he stopped feeling much sexual desire.
I am not sure why you attack radical feminism; generally radical feminists are not vociferous supporters of trans activism. I can also say that many women are rightly offended by men using their reality as a fetishist, radical feminists or not. I have a visceral reaction to men who do this, as a women who has suffered from misogyny, and although we don't want to base movements on feelings, there are valid reasons women don't want to be around AGPs and we owe them noting. It is like one more insult men can help upon women.
Well, looks like your series is going to be hotly contested. Personally I don't have a dog in this fight. Really only became aware of AGP at most 2 years ago, initially through becoming aware of trans issues by seeing news related to adolescents. After retiring last year seemed to have spent more time reading about this, thinking about it from the perspective of my graduate level training in neurobiology and behavior. So looking forward to reading your future contributions to this series, where I'm hoping you will be able to provide more detail on data driven studies that have been done to date and discussion of what future studies might look like. Not sure how much progress you're going to be able to make in terms of changing anyone's thinking. Are you planning at all to take this project into more trans activists venues also? Seems that if you want the scientific approach you are promoting to have any hope of having an impact on policy making that offers compromises that are reasonable for everyone you need to work both sides.
The technical lexicon used here is part of the fake scholarship and fake science of critical gender theory and should be canceled. "autogynephilia"... you mean cross-dressing fetish? Just use that term.