Neither should be casually dismissed I agree with wholeheartedly however it’s not possible I think to effectively treat those who are in fact receptive to what I called “real” treatment without a genuine interest in psychological roots including issues with masculinity—That said I could have added that effective treatment also requires cultivating empathy for others who have been harmed as well as holding compassion for the person in front of me, which I do incorporate in the care I provide
Sometimes though I’m afraid people are more invested in accountability alone without offering any treatment and are making judgements about motives which are not so black and white such as hatred of women and narcissistic entitlement without appreciating the concept of narcissism as a defense against shame and inadequacy—as Joe points out, they are linked
Appreciate the opportunity you gave me to clarify and also reflect on what I meant which came off as possibly dismissive, I think it’s more accurate to say that although reactions like people are showing here are natural they are nonetheless based on assumptions that fit a narrative about toxic masculinity that is not necessarily wrong but misses the irony that Joe is pointing out about internalized shame and unmet dependency needs connected to men’s socialization into this same restrictive definition of mascunilty
Neither should be casually dismissed I agree with wholeheartedly however it’s not possible I think to effectively treat those who are in fact receptive to what I called “real” treatment without a genuine interest in psychological roots including issues with masculinity—That said I could have added that effective treatment also requires cultivating empathy for others who have been harmed as well as holding compassion for the person in front of me, which I do incorporate in the care I provide
Sometimes though I’m afraid people are more invested in accountability alone without offering any treatment and are making judgements about motives which are not so black and white such as hatred of women and narcissistic entitlement without appreciating the concept of narcissism as a defense against shame and inadequacy—as Joe points out, they are linked
Appreciate the opportunity you gave me to clarify and also reflect on what I meant which came off as possibly dismissive, I think it’s more accurate to say that although reactions like people are showing here are natural they are nonetheless based on assumptions that fit a narrative about toxic masculinity that is not necessarily wrong but misses the irony that Joe is pointing out about internalized shame and unmet dependency needs connected to men’s socialization into this same restrictive definition of mascunilty
I'll second that and add that the author is minimizing the damage, the danger and the misogyny these selfish men cause.